"There is no shame in taking orders from those who themselves have learned to obey."
~ William Edward Forster ~
~ William Edward Forster ~
When her Master told her that she was the first girl in his home, she thanked him for allowing her to serve him that way. maralyn would do anything for him
and was very grateful that he saw in her qualities that might allow her to assist new girls in learning to please Gorean men and in learning about the
feelings, doubts, fears, joys and pleasures they were feeling in their hearts and bellies. He expected her to show them, by her own actions what behavior is
expected of girls in his home. He expected her to offer to them her experiences as a Gorean slave girl, both in a tavern and in a personal collar. He expected
her to explain to them places they could go to research and learn on their own.
maralyn took her assignment very seriously. When the Blue Inlet was open, she kept notes of who had been offered service, which of the Free was
being served by which girl, what they had requested of her. When the room was full, it was extremely hectic and some nights she would have five or six
whispers going at once as girls wondered who they might offer to, where things were located in the room, explanations of how to serve particular foods and
drinks. She loved it! It was for "him"! and every time he put his hand in her hair, every time he smiled at her in between conversing with his friends, every
time he whispered to her, her heart soared with love and devotion.
maralyn began to spend time with the new girls, her heart opening to them, wishing the best for them. She developed programs for their growth in the small ways she was allowed to. Of course, the men in the longhouse were much more instrumental in the teaching of the slaves. maralyn was so happy
to see them develop their serves and dances and it thrilled her when they were found pleasing by her Master and his friends.
But being first girl is not all smiles and pleasures. She struggled with watching very young girls serve these men. It was her "opinion" that they should be out in the offline world, meeting people their own age and living, experiencing, feeling all they could. maralyn took her concerns to her owner, not complaining about
her duties to teach these young girls, but with what she felt was a genuine concern for their well being. He listened to her and then talked to her about
it. She thanks him for explaining to her, as he, of course, did not have to do at all. One of the things he told her, that really stuck was that these girls are going to be here in online Gor whether maralyn thinks it’s a good idea or not. They are going to find a place to serve – now, do we want them to drift off into rooms where they are very apt to be used and abused or do we want to offer them the guidance they seek to learn about their slavery? ~smiles to her Master and his wisdom~
Another problem maralyn faced was the resentment she felt when a girl "went over her head" to the Men when maralyn told her to do something the girl didn’t wish to do. There were times the men allowed this and maralyn was hurt and angry, but she held her tongue, as is her place. Later, when her Master allowed her to "speak freely, but pleasingly", she told him how she felt. He understood her feelings but reminded her that it is the decision of the Free. maralyn thought about her reaction to the situation and realized it is not pleasing for her to waste time and energy on petty feelings of inadequacy and jealousy.
At times, she was frustrated because she didn’t think a girl was applying herself to the lessons maralyn wanted her to. She felt that if a girl didn’t learn the things maralyn was told to teach her that maralyn would fail her Master; she brought her concerns to her owner: To stop teaching and supporting the girls was not her decision to make.
You know what hurt the most? When a girl just disappeared! Poof! After a girl came to the longhouse for weeks. The men spent countless hours with her, maralyn gave her time and opened her heart to a girl and the girl would just leave and never return – wonder what happened to her? was she hurt or worse? Did she decide that Gor was not for her afterall? Was there something that maralyn did that made her chose not to return? Was she still in the rooms, but using a new name? For those girls that disappeared like that, maralyn supposes she will never know the answers to those questions. But, girls, if you are reading this, please know that her Master and this girl cared about you. That we would have understood if you decided to move on, we only wish you had come in and said "I’m fine, good-bye".
maralyn certainly isn’t trying to make being first girl sound so bad. It has it’s own incentives, certainly. And being useful to her Master is one of the most rewarding.
~Humbly submitted by maralyn_SOL~